What surprised me most when I first became a blogger on LJ? All the "experts" who offered unsolicited advice about my psychiatric state, providing a full analysis about how I must be miserable and lonely being a single and childless woman at age 42!  Apparently a lot of part-time therapists read LJ blogs. :) This phenomenon is much more targeted to female bloggers. I rarely see anyone writing comments in the journals of male bloggers questioning why they're not married by a certain age, why they don't have children or critiquing their weight and overall attractiveness level.

However, today, I specifically ask for your advice. :) Recently, I have a sudden and strong desire for male companionship and sex. Despite many bad experiences in the past, I signed up for an online dating site yet again. In general, I'm mostly contacted by very young men (early 20's), or old men (in their 60's)! While age is not really important to me, there are some limitations. First, the guy must be legal such that I'm not arrested for hopping into bed with him. :) In most States, the legal age for consensual sex is 18. Second, the man must be mobile, with the ability to move a lot and not be tied to a demanding career or profession where he spends most waking moments behind a desk or computer screen. To me, an adventurous and open spirit is the most important quality in a companion. Last night, I opened my email and received a message from this smiling guy, age 35, a Foreign Service Officer by profession. Ah, intriguing....

Here's what he has to say about himself in his profile:

"Although I have climbed the highest mountains in Africa, run through Napoleon's battlefields and driven across glaciers in Iceland, I’m still looking for the right person to join me on the next adventure. After seven years of living overseas in the Foreign Service, I recently moved back to the DC area for a longer assignment and am enjoying rediscovering it. Although I crave excitement, sometimes my favorite thing to do is sit at home and listen to good music with a properly proportioned gin and tonic in hand. I’ve been known to cook an elaborate dinner for friends, but often can be caught just eating peanut butter off the spoon. I'm pro Oxford commas and anti pretentiousness. My engineering background can lead to a happy afternoon spent getting greasy under my truck’s engine bay or finessing the latest batch of homemade beer. Giving back to the community is ingrained in me, sometimes it's just shovelling my neighbor's sidewalk but more frequently as a volunteer firefighter and EMT.

Day to day I try to live a responsible life - ethically, environmentally, economically, and I like to believe I’m successful at it. What I am looking for in someone? If you like to spend your Saturday afternoons watching your college's football team play and drinking Miller Light, I'm sure we could find some interesting things to talk about but we might not be a great match. I'd rather go for a hike together, play in a pickup ultimate game, go golfing or check out a random art exhibit to be amazed while cracking sarcastic comments. I'm looking for someone who enjoys exploring and has a sense of humor about all the curve balls life can throw your way. You sit out at the edge of the bell curve, have a sense of wonder and are comfortable in your own shoes. I still ride the back of shopping carts through parking lots. You care about things, but not having things. Hey, me too. Let's go have an adventure together!"

Sounds pretty good, huh? So, we will go have dinner together at the end of the week. A few more photos from his profile, which also caught my eye. I don't like staged or posed pics in dating profiles, but rather shots where people are in natural environments, doing ordinary things. Someone who also loves frozen tundras and taking photos!





And, he likes to play with cute, furry animals in exotic countries. Or, perhaps he's mentally deranged and is having a conversation with the little beast. :)



Experience has taught me many things about the modern dating world. Mostly, that a lot of people nowadays wish to communicate only in the virtual world, making themselves sound interesting and dynamic, yet when you meet in person, they have absolutely no ability to communicate or carry on an engaging conversation. A constant itch and mania to pick up their phone and look at yet another selfie posted by someone, read a useless status update, or some other mind numbing article on a website. I'm also guilty of this on occasion, but I'm not afflicted with the constant need to have my iPhone in my hand, or be scrolling through it at all times. I still value good conversation, looking someone in the eye, and taking things slowly so you can truly get to know someone before having sex with them. This avoids false emotions, connections, and attachments, at least for me.

Maybe next week, I'll share my dating profile on here and you can critique it, and let me know if you would date me. :) Until then, wish me luck for this dinner date. What do you think about this guy, based on his profile and photos? I have no expectations, hopes or an agenda. My overall life mentality is to just go with the flow, let things happen naturally, and not get freaked out when life throws one of its infamous curve balls...in life and in dating.